NEWFLASH: King Richard to be buried in a Ford Fiesta

The Society of Dead Kings has decided to bury King Richard in a Ford Fiesta to commemorate the time and place in which he was discovered.

The documentary which saw the bones of a dead king found under a car park in Leicester have finally agreed on how to bury him.

Richard Head, one of the members of the Dead King Society said: “We spent many an hour planning how to bury him. Then we thought ‘fuck it’ and decided we’d get a Ford Fiesta with a regal bearing and haughty manner, stuff the bones in there and then sail the thing on the Thames. We’re thinking of lighting the whole thing up with petrol like Vikings used to do, just in case he comes back as a ghost, demon spawn or white walker.”

Unfortunately this has sparked some controversy with the ASS group or ‘Automobile Safety Squad’ as they believe the Ford Fiesta should be released back into the wild to live out the rest of its life and not to be “some sort of sick living womb for a bunch of bones.”

Others have argued: ‘why not bury the bastard where you dug him from?’ But that’s foolish as King Richard couldn’t possibly pay for a parking ticket everyday.

Disgruntled News – defecating on the chest of news

Man says fuck Richard, this brick is mine.

Man says: ‘Fuck Richard, this brick is mine’.

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